A dark cloud looms

We are currently trapped on our sceptred isle as all flights in and out have been cancelled today. Is this another case of that militant tendency, the BA cabin crew, striking again? Clearly not. There’s not a bank holiday in sight for at least another two weeks so there are no vacation plans for them to upset. Apparently, a large cloud of volcanic dust is sweeping its way down England’s green and pleasant land with the potential to clog up aeroplane engines. The BBC online news reports that it’s ‘eerie at Aberdeen’. So, no change there then.

I’m not sure I believe this story. It seems very odd that the cloud is coinciding with the most momentous event in British political history i.e. THE DEBATE. Could it be a cover for a known terrorist plot? Maybe they were going to parachute onto the building and wipe out all three non-entities in one fell swoop; thereby making tonight’s viewing marginally more interesting. Or perhaps it’s a means of stopping anyone who was intending to fly to anywhere for a long weekend in order to escape the already interminable dearth of non-election reporting. Actually, that’s probably it: they’ve created a ‘day after tomorrow’ type news item so that we all stay indoors to watch TV to see how Nick, Dave and Gordy intend to cope with impending doom. Anyway, I’m going to bring the washing in just in case it’s true.